The Moon Ladder

1 (the dark side of the Moon Ladder)

When you see it in the Katalog it looks great: an infinitely extensible ladder that unfolds when you cry ‘I want! I want!’


The Moon Ladder is really only useful if you have to wash the Moon, and if you don’t know how to fold it, will not fit in your garage.


Sometimes I get halfway up the Moon Ladder, and realise I’ve forgotten my chamois leather, and have to go back for it, which is a real pain.


The view from the top of the Moon Ladder is mostly of the Moon, which could do with a good wash. It’s like someone smeared cheese on a mirror.


What people think of as moondust is really that instant porridge crap. You don’t want to spill a bucket of dirty water in a crater of that.


Then there’s all the people on the Moon. They don’t like you but they want to use your Moon Ladder. Trouble is, they’re up there for a reason.


Turns out the ladder they used for the Moon landings is a Moon Ladder too so they didn’t need to go to all that trouble but don’t tell them.

2 (the lighter side of the Ladder)

There are those who say the Moon Ladder was faked, and that there couldn’t be a ladder extending from anywhere on Earth to any moon.


These are clearly people who have never walked out beneath the freight of stars and cried ‘I want! I want!’ and saw the Moon Ladder appear.


When you see the faint glimmer of the thin tubules of the Moon Ladder extend from your feet up into the night, your hand is drawn to grip it;


your foot is drawn to the first rung of millions of rungs: the Moon Ladder doesn’t just extend from the Earth, it extends from the heart.


Often, halfway down the Moon Ladder with a basket full of freshly picked lunar mushrooms, I find a thick web has formed an orb about it.


This is the glowing nest of a giant spider drifting in from the asteroid belt, and is filled with millions of its babies like beads of jet.


I let go of the Moon Ladder and it dissolves, except for the section with the orb, which floats away. Then I say again, ‘I want! I want!’


One thought on “The Moon Ladder

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )


Connecting to %s