Moon News

Moon mastodon

Moon mastodon on a surfboard (with optional pointy Georgian gent)

The Moonitaur reports he often sees Sting and the ghost of Michael Jackson walking on the Moon. But he hides behind modules till they’re gone.


Sting is writing an illustrated book called ‘Walks in the Moon District with Sting’, but the ghost of Michael Jackson says Sting can’t draw.


Sting says, ‘Giant crayons are what you take, when drawing on the Moon,’ but the ghost of Michael Jackson says that’s rubbish.


In other Moon news, the Moonitaur says his moon brassicas are doing well this year because the Moon Cicadas are sleeping beneath the moondust.


The Moonitaur has been following vast herds of moon mastodon as they migrate from the dark side of the Moon to the Sea of Mass Extinction.


There the moon mastodon drink thirstily from the tears of the interstellar dead, drawn from their eye sockets by the Moon’s emotional pull.


As the moon mastodon consist only of fossil bones, dead tears pour through them, forming a stream as they proceed to the Mountains of Madness.


The Moonitaur lies by the River of Interstellar Tears and listens to it weep, to the receding thump of mastodon feet, and to the creak of their bones.


The Moonitaur has been on the Moon so long he can’t remember which Moon it is: the Moon in the sky or the Moon buried deep within the Earth?


The stars above, even the Earth itself, as it goes through its cycles from new to full, could be the work of the creator of the Lunar Labyrinth…


The Moonitaur often wonders if the moon’s creatures – skeletal herds and insect hoppers – are in actuality automata created to beguile him.


Many times he’s been tempted to call Pope Hulk for counsel on the moon barnacle-encrusted Pope Phone, but he fears being overheard by Sting.


Sting famously has detachable grey cauliflower ears, which crawl over the lunar landscape, throbbing obscenely & listening out for Moon news.


Finally, the Moonitaur decides that he must go on pilgrimage to Yùtù, the Jade Rabbit, for answers to all his yearnings, and gardening tips…


One thought on “Moon News

  1. The moon has always been there for us
    But never here for me.
    It has rarely been closer
    still it keeps its distance
    the aloof idjit.

    I don’t like the moon as much as it likes to think.
    The moon is extraordinarily vain
    and prey to some quite common delusions.
    Sometimes I shiver to think of it
    Wastefully dumping its light on the cloud tops.

    The moon and the pines have made a grotto together.
    Shamefully they lie recycling sunshine.
    I tell them there’s a new moon coming.
    One it’s unsettling to think about.

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