Soup Monkeys

Soup monkeys are to soup as gremlins are to aeroplanes: when you’re not looking a green paw will arise in the midst of your soup and add too much salt.


Sometimes, gazing into your gazpacho, you think you see your own reflection, made bumpy by veg. But no. It is a Soup Monkey, staring back.


Soup Monkeys have the power of autotomy and, if startled, will leave a tail neatly coiled in yr soup bowl. Touched by a spoon, it dissolves.


You may think those are wontons, floating in your soup, but, when you glance away, the eyes of Soup Monkeys open and regard you coldly.


Burnt soup is caused by the skin of Soup Monkeys’ rumps being pressed to the bottom of the pan as they seek out heat like Japanese Macaques.


Soup Monkeys’ fur is actually composed of psychoactive fungal strands: putting your soup in a blender will merely facilitate their ingestion.


You can send off for packets of instant Soup Monkeys and grow your own colonies! See the ads at the back of any edition of Kimerical Komix.

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